It May Be Time To #BanValentinesDay

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Every year, on February 14th, men become pawns in an evil game called Valentine’s Day. The game is relatively simple. There aren’t any rules but there is a method to the madness. Show the person you care about how much you care about them monetarily. Generally it’s the man who foots most of the bill to celebrate this imaginary holiday. Yes, some women do shell out chips to showcase affections for the man in her life, but for the most part Valentine’s Day is a day where male fools fall victim to the gold dig.


Valentine’s Day, first and foremost, is not a real holiday. But if you pay attention, it gets more commercial push these days than the holidays that are actually substantiated. This is no coincidence. One would be hard pressed to find more Father’s Day commercials than Valentine’s Day commercials, even though fathers are real things (for the most part) while Cupid is an imaginary cherub that the fires projectiles at your most vital organ for his amusement. Get the hell out of here.


Question: Before Valentine’s Day frolics its way across the calendar, how many commercials do you see about spending endless amounts of hard-hustled dollars on your loved one? If monetarily showing your love to your spouse or significant other was that¬†important it would be a year-long campaign, no? This also goes hand-in-hand with saying you shouldn’t wait for February 14th to openly display affection to those that deserve it. Granted, as men, sometimes we need a little motivation to show our appreciation, but I’ll be damned if I let somebody convince me that I need to buy diamonds on this particular day in order to do so. That’s utter nonsense, like a cow that speaks gibberish.


And speaking of nonsense, I think it’s cool the way people banded together to attempt to ban Columbus Day. Sure, it started off slow and the process was a tedious one one, but the outcome is yielding positive results. Lies unfurled and minds opened as people nationwide have come together in agreement that we shouldn’t be celebrating a day that praises and glorifies the grandest of larcenies, execution, greed, and ubercapitalism. I think the same political aggression should be applied to vanquishing Valentine’s Day. Men are seemingly targeted, isolated, and underscored expected to perform in some ridiculous capacity to prove love. In a worst-case scenario the woman allows herself to be brainwashed by the ballyhooed propaganda as it pumps out of the television and radio for Valentine’s Day, and the man — already dangerously in love — falls victim to heist. V-Day is nothing short of emotional terrorism and I think that we should be done with it immediately.


Some places across the country have opted to call it different things such as Lover’s Day, Couples Day, Honey’s Day, things of that nature. I’m all for that, however, if it’s still the exact same thing then what’s the point? It will be like calling Columbus Day “New Lands Day.”


On a practical level, the amount of money spent on frivolous, ridiculous, unnecessary gifting in the sanctified name of so-called love could be applied elsewhere in our economy. We’re talking billions of dollars being thrown at Valentine’s Day. If we all donated the money we intend to spend, I’m sure something could be cured or remedied. Yet instead, we buy edible underwear and cards and whatever other impulse item is placed at our eye or hand line.


And on a more personal level, what about the ugly, lonely, undesirable people? The people that don’t get Valentine’s prizes because they’ve no one to love them. Surely they hear my logic even if I can’t feel their pain.


Basically this is my call to arms. I’m not sure what the next step is but I know one thing. Valentine’s Day needs to be banned and hopefully you agree and will help me spread the dubious word.


Thanks for your support.


Words by Tony Grands

Tony Grands is a husband, father, recovering alcoholic, Hip Hop head, and realist from Los Angeles, CA. For more Hip Hop Culture For Grown-Ups, visit, follow Tony on Twitter, or befriend him on Facebook.

2 Responses to “It May Be Time To #BanValentinesDay”
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  1. […] has nothing to do with Cuffing Season nor the banning of Valentine’s Day. It’s about watching your back, as we should all do, as men, for each […]

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